Romanticynicism: Love in the Irony Age

Some people dont feel safe in love unless its complete, absolute, and unconditional. Others (me, for one) only feel safe in love when it isnt. I feel safest when I, and those who love with me, know that love can never be complete, absolute, and unconditional, that unconditional love is only unconditional under certain conditions. If those certain conditions can be relied upon to last a long time, then love can feel unconditional, but it never really is.

This kind of romantic pragmatism can apply not only to loving relationships but to all the things we love. The question we all face is how to love in a world where everything changes; how to embrace life even though you dont get to keep it. For me the answer lies in romanticynicism.

Romanticynicism is a commitment to both the romantics yearning for happily ever after and the cynics detachment and indifference. (Not haughty indifference. Thats a recent addition to what started out as a respected school of Greek philosophy that cultivated neutrality.) Its not a hybrid or blending of the two. Its an extended stretch into both the warm fuzzies of the heart and the cool rationality of the head.

Either romanticism or cynicism alone is dangerous. Romantics are easily hurt. Cynics are readily hurtful. Averaged theyre bland. People who are mildly romantic and mildly cynical are mild. But if you can yoga-stretch yourself into a deep commitment to the romantic and a firm commitment to the cynical, even though the tension imposes some pain and un-resolvability upon yourself, the resulting state is bittersweet, vivid, and true.

The Quakers say, Build to last a hundred years; be ready to leave tomorrow.

The Buddhists say, Though my heart is on fire, my eyes are cold as ashes.

A New york times editor said, Keep an open mind but dont let your brains spill out.

F. Scott Fitzgerald said, The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to act.

Shakespeare ends a dying mans love sonnet to his young lover, This thou perceivest, that makes thy love more strong, to love that well that thou must leave ere long. Stronger love, not weaker. To burn with love while knowing that it too shall pass.

To me, romanticynicism seems the only way to love safely, sanely, and generously. Generously because sometimes the most loving thing to do is to leave someone alone. True love requires a broad repertoire and the pragmatic flexibility to adapt to whats needed. True love cant be achieved with adoration aloneat least not these days.

These days humanity knows more about itself, more about the long view than ever before. Culturally, weve been around the block a few times. Weve seen all kinds of things. Our explanations are becoming more reliable and accurate. And because things are changing faster than ever, theres more evidence that what you love wont hold still for long. Its harder to be a pure romantic these days, believing we can cling to anyone or anything as if it will last forever. Even our sincerest beliefs wont hold still. Our loss of navet makes us conviction-impaired. Were naturally surrendering into the cynical, detached from what will soon disappear anyway.

Yet theres also more reason to be romantic. At least in rich countries, were accustomed to things going well. Our advanced market economy encourages romance, a belief that products, services, and people can make us happy ever after. Weve enjoyed reliable technological progress for long enough that we assume the ideal is forthcomingwhat isnt perfect now will soon be.

More reasons to hope; more reasons to be suspicious of hope. Our technological success has ingrained in us faith and confidence in the potential for happy endings, while our experience gives us more reasons to doubt that the endings we see will be happy.

Being torn between romance and cynicism is bound to feel unstable, but its also an admirably accurate way to interpret what life has to offer. Its like irony, the cultural movement whose motto is, No seriously, Im just kidding. Like irony, romanticynicism can be turned into glib escapism, as though a baldly stated paradox turns every utterance into nonsense. stretching to put a foot in both camps can be a recipe for ungroundedness. But firm footing in both makes for an honest, profound way of life.

Id recommend romanticynicism to anyone, but I suspect that it comes naturally to some of us and not at all to others. Some people simply seem born to either believe or disbelieve. And certainly some circumstances make it harder to be romanticynical than others. I suspect my temperament and circumstances conspire to make romanticynicism the obvious solution.

I know people who also think it is the obvious solution, but dont pursue it because their temperaments wont complypeople who by mid-life recognize the flaws in a purely romantic view of love but just cant help falling and then getting burnt and then falling and getting burnt again. They get sadder but not wiserand they know it but cant figure out what to do about it.

The jurys out on whether we can adapt to the ironic age weve created. Romanticynicism seems the adaptive frame of mind for it, but one that some of us just cant get to from here.

Heres the full Shakespeare sonnet:

Sonnet 73

That time of year thou mayst in me behold When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang Upon those boughs which shake against the cold, Bare ruind choirs, where late the sweet birds sang. In me thou seest the twilight of such day As after sunset fadeth in the west, Which by and by black night doth take away, Deaths second self, that seals up all in rest.

In me thou seest the glowing of such fire, That on the ashes of his youth doth lie, As the death-bed whereon it must expire, Consumed with that which it was nourishd by. This thou perceivst, which makes thy love more strong, To love that well which thou must leave ere long.

Jeremy Sherman Ph.D. teaches life and social sciences, is executive director of the UC Berkeley Project on Emergent Dynamics, a program to develop a comprehensive theory on how purpose, goal setting and the pursuit of success emerged from a universe governed only by the laws of phyics and chemistry--a program to put goal-seeking behavior in a fully scientific context. Jeremy writes an article a week for the free e-newsletter and podcast "Mind Readers Dictionary: Tips for reading between the lines with greater comprehension."

Jeremy Sherman, Ph.D.
September 01, 2006
http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com
js@mindreadersdictionary.com

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Manhunt 2 Review - Just Like The Original

manhunt 2 is the sequel to Rockstar Games' original manhunt from 2003. The video game is available for the Nintendo Wii, PlayStation 2, and PSP. This game has been receiving more attention for its rating than its quality. After being tagged with an adult rating, Rockstar Games reduced the rating down to mature. Finally, manhunt 2 has made it way into gamers' hands.

The storyline in manhunt 2 is about the protagonist named Daniel Lamb. Daniel Lamb is a scientist who is conducting unethical research at an edifice (Dixmor Insane Asylum). Unluckily, Daniel Lamb and his colleagues lose their funding for their research. Despite the lack of funding, they decide to pursue their research. One stormy night, a thunderstorm struck near the Dixmor Insane Asylum. As a result of the inclement weather conditions, there was a power outage. All of the inmates in the Dixmor Insane Asylum become free, and chaos ensues. The plot in the game was much different from the director style approach in the original manhunt. I thought the storyline in this game was about as convoluted as manhunt.

In regards to the gameplay, much of the gameplay from manhunt remains intact in manhunt 2. These gameplay features entail a radar, distracting foes, alertness level of adversaries, and stealth. Stealth is still the name of the game in manhunt 2, and gamers will learn that stealth kills are much easier to perform than other kills. The original manhunt was more gory than manhunt 2, and manhunt 2 has been drastically censored. just like the first game, you can execute three types of stealth kills depending on your timing. Players can perform a swift kill, violent kill, or gruesome kill. Holding the attack button longer will result in the more gratifying kills. Some new features to the gameplay include utilizing your surroundings to eradicate opponents. For instance, lighting an enemy on fire is allowed in the game. Executing hunters with a firearm is another new addition to the game.

There are also those contact sensitive moments in the game (ala Resident Evil 4 and God of War). Artificial intelligence itself is a complete disaster. There are enemies in this game who do an abysmal job of locating where you are hiding. This is especially conspicuous when they are aware of your presence. These opponents acted like a bunch of blind and asinine squirrels attempting to find an acorn. I did not know whether to laugh or shake my head in disbelieve. To makes matters worse, none of the enemies have any idea how to use a gun. All of them fire their guns inaccurately and imprecisely. I have seen better shooting when Dick Cheney fired a shotgun. On the bright side, gamers are given much more freedom to explore the environment in this adaptation of the game. This is due to the fact that you can shoot out the lights and the incompetence of the hunters.

Regrettably, this takes away from the challenge of the game. Moreover, it makes the game vastly more rudimentary than it needed to be. The majority of the gameplay itself is redundant. This is fine as long as the gameplay is engrossing. I am sorry to say that the grotesqueness seems to wear thin after approximately the first few hours of the game. More than one ending is possible, but both endings leave some vague unanswered questions left at the conclusion of the game. The game does have adequate audio. Voice acting is believable, and I thought the music fit the tone of the game perfectly. Moreover, the sound effects are realistic with the glass shattering and the cutting of bones. Overall, manhunt 2 is a video game is has some enjoyment. But it is really only for the manhunt enthusiasts.

Final Verdict: manhunt 2 is an average game.

7 out of 10

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Stress Management In The Workplace: Handling Work Stress

Stress management in the workplace is a reality that most of us have to face for one reason or another and coping with it is key to long-term career success.

Some careers are more stressful than others and some companies and managers you work for might provide you with more stress than youd otherwise like.

Having some stress can be helpful because it can provide motivation that allows you to work with a bit of a sense of urgency and purpose.

When stress in the workplace reaches a high level and carries over to your personal life in a negative way though, this is a sign that you need to do something to properly manage it so that it doesnt spiral out of control further.

Here are some suggestions for successful stress management in the workplace:

1. Try to address issues that might be affecting your stress level that you might not readily think of, especially the ones you can change. Do you drive 1 hour to work each day and feel beaten up by the time you get into the office each morning? Are there ways you can lighten your workload? Do you need to learn how to say no to certain requests from time to time? Look for ways of changing how you to things especially ones you have some control over.

2. Look for ways to improve your time management. Often, stress is a result of simply not having enough time to complete everything you need to do. Stop wasting time talking with colleagues and making personal phone calls, stop surfing the Internet for personal reasons, and eliminate other time wasters. Shut your office door if you have trouble with people walking in and distracting you or find a quiet office where you can work undisturbed if necessary.

3. Find some sort of athletic endeavor to take part in. I like working out at the gym but you might find jogging, playing squash or taking yoga classes will help. Try something athletic that gets your mind off work. Start by going for a walk at lunchtime just to get out of the office for a bit.

4. Dont neglect your personal life. Remember to try to find the proper balance between your work life and your work outside of work. Try when possible to leave work at work. A separation between work and personal life is paramount.

5. Carefully consider whether or not you are in the right job. If successful stress management at work is just not possible and if you yearn for your time with a previous employer when things were better, maybe youre in the wrong job. Do you like what do you or is it simply a job to you? If its simply a job there might be other jobs that are less stressful that are better suited to your personality.

Stress management in the workplace is critical to your long-term career and long-term health. When stress management is simply not achievable through change, consider consulting a doctor for a medical opinion in case you are suffering from more than just stress.

Carl Mueller is an Internet entrepreneur and professional recruiter who wants to help you find your dream career.

Visit Carl's website to separate yourself from other job searchers: http://www.find-your-dream-career.com

Sign up for The Effective Career Planner, Carls free 5-day course: http://www.find-your-dream-career.com/effective-career-planner.html

Ezine editors/Webmasters: please feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your website. please dont change any of the content and please ensure that you include the above bio that shows my website URL. If you would like me to address any specific career topics in future articles, please let me know.

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BlackBerry Cell Phone Review

A permanent access to all your emails... You dream about it? Blackberry phone did it. The BlackBerry is a wireless handheld device introduced in 1999 which supports push email, mobile telephone, text messaging, internet faxing, web browsing and other wireless information services. Same size as a PDA, with a mini keyboard, BlackBerry device allows you to receive and reply to emails.

How does it work? Connected to a cell phone network (Cingular BlackBerry, T-mobile BlackBerry, sprint BlackBerry, Nextel BlackBerry and Verizon BlackBerry), terminal BlackBerry regularly query the email server of the user. When a new email arrives, the terminal signals it. The user can then read the message and reply. Innovation comes from the fact that synchronization of the emails with the messaging server is real time through the cell phone network it is connected and it supports both GSM, GPRS and UMTS.

Of course, BlackBerry service is more specifically dedicated to companies. The devices are very popular with some businesses, where they are primarily used to provide email delivery to roaming employees. To fully integrate the BlackBerry cell phone into a company, the installation of BlackBerry Enterprise server is required.

but the popular device BlackBerry that allows reading emails using cell phone network is forbidden in some companies. Indeed, some security experts fear about communications being intercepted. However, Research In motion (RIM), editor of BlackBerry, claims that all the traffic is encrypted from start to end by the Blackberry servers installed in companies. In fact it has the exact same security level as a traditional VPN if correctly configured.

A Blackberry handheld allows users to fulfill their need of communication but also give them the feeling of control that a phone conversation doesn't offer. More and more professionals often work in mobility situation and need to permanently be connected to computing system of the company.

According to a recent study, one third of business users show signs of BlackBerry addiction almost similar to those of alcoholism. Some people even use the ironical term "crackberries" to name the phenomenon. Also, most users are supposed to get BlackBerry devices to enhance their productivity but their constant attachment to email make it hard for them to concentrate on other things when they are out of office.

The professional Blackberry is a "all in one" terminal, phone/PDA/messaging, which design is optimized to allow users to manage emails on the go and to access various applications. The original BlackBerry device had a monochrome display, but all current handsets have color displays.

Most BlackBerry devices is equipped with a full QWERTY keyboard, The ease of keying in and sending not only emails, but also sms, is particularly practical, even if they do not have a BlackBerry.

However, the BlackBerry has no memory extension, no 3G compatibility, no camera and not much style. What is more, multimedia functions still remain low compared to other Symbian or windows mobile. That is until today with RIM unveiling its first and brand new multimedia phone dubbed the new BlackBerry Pearl. but still BlackBerry devices depend on mobile phone service coverage and are not wifi compatible unlike similar handheld devices that are on the market now.

RIM BlackBerry is increasingly integrating instant messaging into their new devices and software. RIM offers its own proprietary BlackBerry Instant Messenger, but also offer a yahoo Chat and Google Talk clients and probably an upcoming BlackBerry MSN Messenger client.

According to RIM, BlackBerry PDA is used by about 5.5 million users worldwide.

Blackberry is used by almost 3 million users in America. Some sources say about 1 million government employees are regular users. Canada is another one of the key market of the company.

While including the usual PDA applications such as address book, calendar, to-do lists, etc you can always download more BlackBerry software like games, ringtones, themes, webclient and other applications.

Find more information about BlackBerry cell phone at Ringtone Jam Jam. The website also provides BlackBerry ringtones for download.

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